Monday, March 24, 2008

The girl that stepped into my life… the one I was waiting for.



Years down the line, I have seen breakups and bad relationship around me.. Revolving besides me. College days passed by and the feeling for infatuation started reducing down. Felt, need for more of a companion than silly affairs, that may or may not work out.

Always thought life takes u at right places, when ever, things have to happen in your life.

And this was the start of me, looking casually on internet, through an website, which was meant to socialize with people.

Don’t know why I came across this profile, and thought of saying “hi”. While scraping I was thinking “why dude”.. Why do u need to scrap. !

But don’t know something felt in the heart and hands started typing.. thought what’z wrong in knowing a person. I don’t want to be her best friend. Nor I’m a flirt. But want to know her. !

Days passed, and I got a reply. Which was quite strange? Thinking I was a friend’s friend.. and a little misunderstanding with my profile, things went ahead. !

Scraps started and slowly it boiled down to calling on mobiles. Had always this nice feeling inside the heart, when I talked with this girl. !

thode natkhat.. thode angry honewale. ! thode understanding. ! thought wow. ! she is a good girl. ! a good friend. J

But I guess, god had something in his own mind, and smiling from above trying to tell me something else. Days passed by and months over, and one day I was sitting with this girl, across my table, with her parents and relatives congratulating me..

A sweet lighting struck on me, and my mind said, dude, u have chosen her. ! She’s the one.

But was she the one..?

I always had this thought in my mind, that when ever I would go for an marriage, in my life, it would be love marriage. ! with this feeling that I should know the person.

But now, when I stand and look back, and I really think, that do I really know each and every person, I had spend time with. ? I Guess, I cant..

People change and time changes.

Might be I went ahead, saying yes she is the one, because, I know her. Know her how. ? Just by talking.

And then I was into actual into this “commited” relationship, things were so different.

Well people say, that marriage and life partners are decided in heaven, but its damn ½ way information. U have to work out on ur marriage and partners and ur reln day in and day out. !

Meeting this beautiful girl, who is fair, smart, having a nice body… made me melt, and felt I have hit a jackpot…

Every time, when me and my friends use to sit and discuss abt reln I was the one to mentor and tell that its more than having physical love. !

And now it was time for me to prove it. ! Well, believe me, that is the most difficult exams, I must have ever faced.

Being away from my fiancé, I had left out nothing but talking on the phone. And ohh boy, now u realize, how its diff to be with ur fiancé and how you should understand things.

To tell honestly, we fought and fought, initially. Was very difficult to adjust with a person, who makes strong his/ her views. And I was like what the heck. !? why cant she understand. ..

But one thing I was missing, and couldn’t hear, is “why cant you hear me Yatin”.

This sweetest girl told me that guys and gals think on two separate lines.

Better late than never, even though parents decide on our marriage, I still think, that being friends is more important thing to be done before getting married. !

And why not, when u are going to spend this whole life, with the person, don’t u think being friends is necessary. ?

(this is what I realize)

Hello.!! U hang around those ppl, who are friends, then why not be with ur girl best friend…. !

And silly me, took me time to understand…

But thank god, when I started looking more at her as a friend, thinks went so smooth… we really started getting closer, trying to understand.

Today I realize, that no matter the age, and I m older than her, she is one of the most mature girls, I have ever seen, who knows how to handle the situation and sometimes me too J ;) . Not that m saying that she is “madam perfect”, but she definelty tries to make me a perfect man.

Girl.. being loved by you is such a great feeling, that.. Those things which u have never ever found or looked at or realized feel so good. !

Just an instance, was traveling through company bus on my way home.., and thinking about you… missed u a lot and looked at sky. ! And believe me; m not faking by actually never felt the clouds look so beautiful. May be I might sound mad in love, but I had never felt so beautiful looking at the clouds and thinking about my mate... or should I rightly say “my life mate “… my soul mate.

Girl, I don’t know if I’m the right person, for u or not, but I’m truly saying, I will do and go ahead with all my steps, to be the right person for you. You coming into my life, has changed life, and words cant express, how much it has changed. It has made me a better person, than I’m. Sometimes, I fear, that always expressing so much and feeling so much elevated with my thoughts thinking about u …. Is good or bad. ? Would u be bored, would u be happy..?

But when I’m typing today, words don’t have a limit and feel like going on and on with u. U know I had read about this incident… which goes like this “every b’day a loving husband use to gift flowers to his wife.. without fail.. no matter which place he was no matter, what weather was outside..”. years passed by, and her husband passed away. After her husbands, death, the old lady felt sad, very sad on her b’day , coz every year, her husband use to get her flowers.. “

And suddenly the door knocked, and the flower delivery guy , gave roses to his old lady.. with a note saying “Honey, even though, I’m not with you, I will be always around u loving”..

Sweetie, I really want to be this person, in your life, no matter what not matter where, I want to love you like this. And I really pray god that please please make me a better person to keep my love of my life happy… I’m really sorry If ever, I have hurt you in any way.. U have really shown me what love is..

U know, just few years back I was watching this movie, kuch kuch hota hai, and SRK says, “mera saar hamesha teen cheezo ke samne, zukega- durgamaa, mera maa, and my love of my life”.. I don’t remember the exact dialog,. But that is how it went. And I burst ur laughing , saying what crap is this. !

Today being with u girl, I realize, how much respect matters for each other. ! I truly respect you in all due sense, and as a friend, fiancé and my to be wife, you mean a lot to me. Not just for the sake, but a respect, which I always show, towards u.

Words would go on and on.. but I think I need to stop somewhere. !

Time passes by.. and so would our lives.. just wish to see you and me holding hands sitting on bench, and watching the same love.. in each others eyes, as we have now… looking at you and saying. I love you. ! Even though we are on the verge of end of our life. !

Love you girl. J

Wrong choices of love


You might make a bad decision just to stay together. Here are mistakes you can learn from

In today’s world finding love is not as easy or simple as it was back in the day. With growing awareness and change in life styles, even the love game has gone through an evolution. Sometimes, when we find someone who is even remotely right for us, we tend to try anything just so that the relationship works. While its great to be so persevering. You need to understand that making decisions just so that you and your partner stay together without actually analysing the situation can be harmful in the long run. You cannot make a relationship decision based on just the yearning to be with someone. The following are a few bad decisions people make, when it comes to relationships. If you are guilty of any, you need to change your perspective.


Parasite tendencies

To love someone and want to be with them is one thing, to get completely obsessed with a man or woman and hound them constantly is just a bad move. If you decide to pursue a man or woman, do it in such a way that he or she gets the hint but at the same time does not feel overwhelmed by you. A person needs space for themselves, so don’t be on his or her case 24/7. Learn to give space.

Conditions
Another bad move people make when it comes to relationships is that they start giving their partner ultimatums and conditions. For example, “If you really loved me, you’d stop drinking” or “if you love me, attend so and so party with me” etc. You need to understand that you can’t force someone to change and just because you are in a long term relationship does not give you the authority to emotionally blackmail your partner. Yes, what you might be suggesting could be good advice but there are better ways of communicating than to give ultimatums. So don’t try the above, it sounds more like a threat than love.

Here comes baby
When things start going slightly wrong in a relationship, many couples make the biggest mistake of deciding to have a baby, to fix things. If two mature adults can’t salvage a relationship, how will a new born child help? Besides, a child is not the solution. You need to sort out issues with your partner first and then decide to have a baby. The child might only make things worse because if you and your partner are not getting along without a baby involved, there is no guarantee that things won’t get worse once the baby arrives. So have a baby when you’re ready and not just because you want to sort things out with your partner.

The green monster
As mentioned above, learn to give space. Don’t get over possessive of your partner and try to keep a track of every move he or she makes. This is not a detective game, it’s your love life so treat it with a little trust.

Gossip
The last thing you want to do when you are having relationship trouble is to talk about it to other people. People often make silly decisions about their marriage based on what someone else says. If you want your relationship to work the decision making has to be between you and your partner. Bad mouthing him or her will only make things worse.

Affairs
When someone is having a bad relationship and can’t get out of it they decided to involve a third party and hope that their spouse finds out just so that a break up can happen. This is not only childish but also insensitive. You do not need to have an affair and hurt everybody involved. If you want out of a relationship, just talk about it or at least try to make things work. Running into the arms of another man or woman won’t make your life any better; in fact you’ll be dealing with two lovers instead of one. So, be careful.

Stay for no reason
The worst decision for any relationship is for two people to remain in one just for the sake of it or because they are too lazy to sort out their issues. You cannot remain with someone only because you have children together or because you have no other option. This decision can scar your entire life. It’s ok to move on if your relationship is making you unhappy. You and your partner can find ways to balance the equation. Of course, open communication could help solve your problems but at least try before giving up. Remember, it takes two people to make or break a relationship.


Agree ? :)

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Mars Vs Venus.. :)

The whole Venus and Mars thing

Why men think with their head and women with their heart...

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the
passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like it, I
just want you to hold me." I said "WHAT????!!! What was that?!" So she says
the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads
to hear..."You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman
enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my
puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I
do for you in the bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with
her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big
unnamed department store. I walked around with her
while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She
couldn't decide which one to take so I told her we'll just buy them all. She
wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a
pair for each outfit. We went onto the jewellery department where she picked
out a pair of diamond earrings.

Let me tell you...she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave
short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.
I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey."

She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.
Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all
dear, let's go to the cashier." I could hardly contain myself when I blurted
out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled
"WHAT???!!!" I then said, "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff
for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man
enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she
had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just
love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either.

“Did u or DO u have ever felt the need of loved one in your life? “


Hi folks,

M back again with a topic that could really make you think. I dont know if this article has been discussed in any newspaper or any magazine , but i have this topic going around my fountain head since a long time,.

Everybody comes across this question, one day or other. Here by the term loved one, i mean boyfriend or girfriend or fiance. M not counting friends, parents or siblings. The reason is these people are always part of out defined frame of life..!! So chums are out

Bring ups or parents.. no matter what, are always there to love and support ya..!


But, at one stage you are standing with your friends, parents around...but still u have kept a small space for someone special. Even though the space might be low or not yet cleared on boundaries, that special place is for someone special , whom you would called the "Loved one".


I'm still baffled, do we or do we not require someone special to desparately come in your life.. or we can live without it.. To take my point of view, i feel and def. feel that i wont mind to have a special someone in my life.. the one with whom i can share my feelings... my happiness my sadness.. tell her something, which i could.. 100% feel .. a trust worthy person..! a person who will never stabb my back , by letting ppl know about some real personal stuff i have told.


But at one point i feel really happy, after watching many rel`nships that .. it might be really gr8 to be single.. Honestly, if have everything for your partner except for love, then the rel`nships def. has a bad ending.. which may result in nothing but depression and utter frustration..

To this point supports my good old buddy
here's what Sameer has to say ...

"You know these days every time I write or say something related to this issue I tend to get bugged up myself. So just want to share the same pakau feeling with all of you.

So here goes: I seriously seriously do not feel the need to have a special someone in my life. Confused…….Let me explain! (Munnabhai style) J

I am single and believe me I am single by choice. It’s not a matter of failing to get a girlfriend or that I am afraid of commitment and all that stuff. It’s just that I hate to see a person who is emotionally dependent upon someone. I have met at least 10/12 couples or pairs and to be honest have often seen that instead of trust, love and maturity, these people carry immense amount of insecurity, only. Believe me if you have all the three feelings for your “love”, no one in this world will ever be unhappy in a relationship. Insecurity stems from the fear of losing the person to someone else. And if you are misunderstanding it as love then be sure that you are not in love with that person but are in love with that relationship only. You don’t need that particular person but you need someone and that someone could be anyone. Bass uss naye insaan ko time dena baki hai, and u are back in you “relationship”. That’s the reason why, in a rebound state after any relationship ends, people fall for someone new…instantaneously. This might sound harsh but this is a regular scenario. Why do you need anyone special in this world if you have the capability to hold on to friends & family members! And if you are not capable of this, then I feel the problem isn’t with the world. It’s inside you. Friends will never have time if you haven’t been there when they needed you…even if it is for trivial issues.


So People, Love is a choice to accept a gift. If you have the maturity, only then be in a relationship. Else…choice is yours!


Well sam, i def. agree with what you say.. But i have one question.. at one point in life.. even though you hve friends around... u need that someone special who will help you to support your feeling.. pamper you in your own way.. and show you that there's some one in this world who really cares for you.

To this feeling my friend kirti has to say this ...

here goes kirti..
Yes..definitely yes…. There are basically two aspects of this need………
One is ..you feel a need to of SOMEONe Special coz you just wana have some special moments in your life … you need to share your feelings (even any foolish ) without any hesitance……
you need coz you feel that
you are special and you are precious to someone….n that gives u more confidence…
the feel good factor!!!!
You need coz sometime wen u r siting alone n think abt the whole world around you…
you feel that still there is some empty space in you….which can only be filled by that special someone…

The other aspect of y do you feel the need is….

In todays world …almost everyone around you is emotionally involved in someone….

So coz of that no one has that much time n attention to give it to u….coz of their own personal commitments…
For eg….In XXX place..amongst all the gals who r my frens everyone is havin BFso … when I need to share my thoughts…at any pt of tim bt none of my fren can be free …..just coz of their personal commitments… So finally I have to have my special someone to fulill all my emotional…psychological needs…….. The only things is even he should reciprocate same feelings towards me………


Well, few need special someone to share and fulfill all emotional and psychological needs..


To this point my friend rucha puts a different direction to think over.. here rucha

"First of all I am very bad in expressing my views in words .....still what I can think of is in every ones life few relationships plays important role .... at every stage of life

Like PARENTSSIBLINGS,FRIENDS...
Most of us get the best treatment from our parents, Elder /younger bro or sis ....a proper love and care ....where you actually find yourself pampered But when we actually start interacting with people of our same age ....we get attracted .... we think alike upto certain extent ... here comes in our life Role of a friend .... this is the entry of diffrent group of people in our life other than family members... further comes many such friends depending upon our compatibility with them .... but by this time when we actually being called as grown up ..we are in need of a friend who can care for us ... little bit Possessive for us ... who may worry if we are feeling lonely ... :) or when we are in trouble ... and we suddenly starts thinking that we are alone and we actually start searching for that person ( I think so ) & sPECIAL FRIEND which is actually a boy friend for a girl and GirlFriend for a boy ... ' comes into our life ..... I dont say 2 girls or boys could not be good friends but I agree with the fact oppsite attracts.. its all upto us how despirately we want some one in our life ..... "



Here one more view on the topic by one my very close friend siddhi..!
Siddhi says..
Hummmm welll, the topic is quite interesting
Many views to share with u

The answer is off course “YES”

At some point of time in life we really feel like having someone special in our life that is truly yours or sometimes can say “totally yours”
The “one” is there for you in each n every moment in life. Let it b d most happiest moment in life or let it b d worst……
The “one” with whom u r most comfortable….
The “one” with whom u would love to be most of the time…..
The “one” with whom u like to share all of ur things, ur thoughts, ur dreams in your life on both emotional as well as practical grounds…..
The “one” for whom ur simplest thing is also most important n vice-versa……
The “one” whom u trust d most n have confidence that this one will never break this trust without any special reason…….
The “one” who accepts you what you are without trying to change urself, off course without a few exceptions……
The “one” who will realize me that I m a girl (hope u both understand what I want to say)…....


The “one” who is perfectly PARTNER of your entire life………


Guys.. i really think, that books mars vs venus.. is somewhat right.? Maritians are not expressive people, where as the venus females are..?

So does that mean, that girls need more emotional support than boys and thatz the reason they hunt for some more strong support or someone to fill that empty special place.?

i think no..!! I have seen headstrong girls and much more carreer minded, who have hardly time to think about all this..


OR have meet girls, who are ready to marry a guy, their parents would suggest, without ever giving a thought over this special somoeone..

But i have meet some friends you are desparado in need to get into a rel`nships..


Finally to my view, i would say that there's is def. a need for a special someone.. But even if u have that specialsomeone in your life.. coming or on his way.. you need the basic thing is "Maturity" to handle it... Also, patience is the virtue , which is not to be neglected in this case.


so guys and gals...keep your eyes, ears and all sense to find out a special someone to fit into the special someone right place..



Please feel free to comment..

An Article by Swami Vivekananda...............


Check out this article bye swami vivekananda ..!! I truelly believe in this..

An Article by Swami Vivekananda...............

I once had a friend who grew to be very close to me.
Once when we were sitting at the edge of a swimming pool, she
filled the palm of her hand with some water and held it
before me, and said this:
"You see this water carefully contained on my hand? It
symbolizes Love."
This was how I saw it:
As long as you keep your hand caringly open and allow it to
remain there, it will always be there. However, if you
attempt to close your fingers round it and try to posses it,
it will spill through the first cracks it finds
This is the greatest mistake that people do when they meet
love...they try to posses it, they
demand, they expect... and just like the water spilling out
of your hand, love
will retrieve from you. For love is meant to be free, you
cannot change its nature. If there are people you love, allow
them to be free beings.
Give and don't expect.
Advise, but don't order.
Ask, but never demand.
It might sound simple, but it is a lesson that may take a
lifetime to truly practice. It is the secret to true love. To
truly practice it, you must sincerely feel no expectations
from those who you love, and yet an unconditional caring